volume sixty-seven

foggy with a chance of hot tea

hi, lauren deborah! is free for subscribers every week.

feel I am not sharing enough? ask me an anonymous question and I will answer it in a future post.

if you want more LD in your life, find me here.

if you would like to say thanks for this love letter, please like or comment (it means so much to me to hear from you 🧡), forward it to a friend who might enjoy it or if you’d like to, you can buy me a slice 🍕

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apologies, for reasons that may become obvious, there is no audio option this week.

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Monday, October 24th, approx 8:07 am

I feel like I am sitting on a throne built of everything I have worked for, everything I have fought for, everything I have challenged people and my past and my path for, everything I have gathered as a result of putting my heart and my hands out there for it. And now that I have it all, and I have built myself this place to sit and look down on all I have accomplished… I am overwhelmed. I am sitting up here with my creativity in full bloom and my passions flowing, while I struggle with pulling them out from the pile to fully release them from everything else. You see, it is all stuck, as all of the things are gathered together to build this pile/throne/mound(?) I am sitting on — layered, stacked, balancing, growing. As I look down on all I have achieved, I realise I cannot enjoy it from up here. I cannot be amongst it if I am sitting here squashing it down and adding more to the pile.

Monday, October 24th, approx 8:45 am

Two lines appear when you hope there will just be one.

Tuesday, October 25th, approx 5 pm

Removes all unnecessary items from your overflowing, overlapping calendar. Makes actual gaps, creates actual boundaries, types up an email auto-reply relaying these new boundaries. Celebrates with a dear friend via zoom whom you are co-working with at the time, enjoying this unusual spurt of energy.

Thursday, October 27th, approx 4:12 pm

Imagine a week when you don’t have the energy to do all the things you have on your list. What goes first? What instantly becomes non-urgent? Non-essential? Joyless? Undeserving? 

How can every week look more like that?

As I look down on all I have achieved, I realise I cannot enjoy it from up here. I cannot be amongst it if I am sitting here squashing it down and adding more to the pile.

But I only need to stand up, letting the things I am gripping so tightly free to come with my pull once I am not holding them down with my weight. The rest stays in the pile. I can always come back to it and pick what I want later… if I somehow miss it.

one more note from me - it is the last week of my efforts!

Did you know that 1 in 5 people experience symptoms of mental illness each year? Every day in Australia, 8 people will die by suicide. Mental illness can be debilitating and can have a devastating impact on not only those living with it, but those around them. This October, I’ll again be taking part in One Foot Forward to show people living with mental illness that they are not alone.

I'm walking to raise funds for the Black Dog Institute to support crucial mental health research and support services to help Australians impacted by mental illness and suicide.

It would mean so much to me if you'd support my walk this October.

Together, we can create a mentally healthier world, for everyone.

If you’re able, you can donate here.

pics or it didn’t happen:

okay

I love you,

LD

xoxo