volume forty-seven

try it on for size

This year I started housesitting. I was inspired by a pal, who has combined their love of travel and pets to see more of the world. The dream. Not only can I see parts of the globe I have longed to, but I can also see them through the eyes of a local. I can see them by living in a neighbourhood and not a tourist hot spot. I can shop at their local grocer, and walk their dog or feed their cat or sing to their plants. My writing can take on entirely new perspectives and shapes by mixing up what is around me, and what or who I interact with while I am in another space.

I describe it as the most community approach to travel.

Not only does housesitting allow me all of these things, but it also lets me try on different versions of myself. There are multiple versions of Lauren that I love, and some days I want to be one and other days another. I am easily inspired by my surroundings and by housesitting and submerging myself into another home and life, I am able to try it on for size, see how I like it, see if I missed it and see if I would try it again.

First, there is the house, apartment, cabin, studio or beach bungalow itself. How big is it? Is it cosy and intimate so that I can avoid too many distractions and cuddle up with a tea? Is it big and exciting, so that the options of where to sit are seemingly endless? How is it decorated? Is it minimalist or is it really well stocked? Does it feel more like a display than a home? Are the furniture and cushions and art on the walls worth more than I could imagine, letting me try on a life I wouldn’t even dream of? Or is it all a mashup of thrifted goodies, market finds, local artists and well-loved items that have taken a heart and soul to collect? Are the walls covered, instead, with decades of memories of friends and family that I get to smile and connect the dots over the week or so? Is it mid-century modern? Contemporary? Traditional? Rustic? Country living farmhouse style that reminds me of my neighbours in my childhood? Beachy casual? Imitating a fancy hotel? Bohemian? What is it about it that I instantly love and become inspired by?

Maybe the pets are something to try on, so to speak, too. It could be a cat that loves to snuggle or a cat that pretends that I don’t exist. Either way, maybe I get a lot of writing done, just one is a whole lot more noteworthy and photogenic for the report for the owners. It could be a dog that insists they’re the right size to sit on my lap, making it impossible to get any writing done so I end up playing tug-o-war or showering them with pets. Or maybe it is a dog that has so much energy, I end up spending most of my time on walks and feel the benefits of all that fresh air, getting to explore those surroundings some more. Maybe it is a bearded dragon so I get my first experience feeding crickets, and feel mixed feelings about that. Maybe it's chickens and I get to go back to young Lauren who loved collecting fresh eggs and having them peck the ground at her feet while she stands in the yard. Maybe it's pigs who like a belly rub, and I consider never living in a city again because this is the life. Maybe it's fish and I recall how mesmerising it can be to sit and watch them for what is sometimes hours.

Do they have a record player? What's their record collection like? Am I playing Bob Dylan while I cook dinner or listening to the New Orleans Preservation Hall Jazz Band while I poach my eggs on a Sunday morning? Am I dancing around or romancing myself? Am I enjoying a lazy, cosy weekend or getting ready for an adventure? Maybe they don’t take their music as seriously and I play something through a streaming app on their tv and see that they love a lot of dance music, which I choose silence over. Maybe I try on classical music as a writing soundtrack. Do they have an impressive cd collection that makes me reminisce on mine and transports me to the decade they likely started collecting them? 

What are their condiments and spice stock like? Is it abundant so that my cooking can reflect that inspiration? Do they have fresh garlic? Minced? Powder? What type of salt do they carry? Is it rock salt in a mortar and pestle or pink Himalayan in a shaker or table salt in a cardboard box shoved in a drawer? There is also the variation in ways to make a hot drink that teach me new techniques all the time. Is it stove top and I am able to slowly enjoy the sacred time of preparing my morning coffee? Something where I just have to press a button? Instant coffee that I only usually drink at my grandparents’ home? Does this mean I make a morning cafe run part of my daily ritual while there? What (or who) do I see on those walks? Is fresh fruit on display in a fruit bowl, prioritising it? Or should it be shoved in a fridge drawer? Can I find a large bowl in the cupboard to use as my fruit bowl while there? Are there mismatched bowls and cutlery curated with eclectic intentions or the perfect set? Is it a small kitchen prompting me to want to order in or do they have a kitchen island I am happy to gather around?

What’s on their bookshelf? Do I pick up something that has been on my wishlist, therefore neglecting the book I brought with me for another time? Or do I think nothing about this collection speaks to me? Do I gasp not realising this person had an autobiography? Do I consider a point of view I never have before and decide to flip through something I have never heard of? Do I look at the collection and think it's not in my usual go-to but I am ready to be inspired and I am most certainly interested, clocking all the things around the home that tell me they are a Buddhist and these books are going to encourage my serenity while I am here, something that a house with a television could never do? Are there magazines by the toilet, something I can never get on board with?

I mentioned the sitting options. Reading chairs? A rocking chair? Couch sprawls? Set up to face a window or the tv? Desk and chair in a room with a view or a room so utterly uninspiring I decide to sit outside instead? Do they have a deck? A hammock? A picnic table? What about my posture and the way I sit (or lay) outside determines how long I stay there to read or write? Hours? All day perhaps? The same as the inside would make me feel a certain way, what is the outside plant and garden situation? Do I get to try on my green thumbs and care for a veggie patch or flower garden or pull out the hose and water twenty potted plants, reminding me of being a child and playing with the hose on summer days? Barefoot, the water overflows and trickles out to touch my toes and cool me down creating nostalgia, as well as another excuse to be outside. Is there a BBQ to encourage outside dining and not having to sacrifice outdoor time for nourishment?

Are there parks nearby? Trees nearby? No one for kilometres nearby? Do they have bikes I can take for a spin or will my neighbourhood strolls be taken on foot? Do I pass neighbours who smile and say hello or people with a blank stare? Do I make friends just for a short period of time? Do I make conversation with Debbie who lives in the guest house?

What are the local grocer and restaurants close by like? Are they small and family-owned, supporting small businesses by buying there, even picking up items not on my list because they look so delicious? Homemade banana bread, fresh homegrown mangoes, eggs from their farm? Are they huge chains that prompt me to google markets close by?

Is there natural light throughout the home, with a great view of the sunrise or sunset from the couch or the patio or the office? Where do I spend those hours as a result? What are the swimming options, if any? Do I make a daily afternoon swims part of my stay? Is there a homely mess or perfect order that I feel out of place? Is it away from the city, helping me embrace peace and quiet or in the city so I long for it? Does the city inspire me to be go, go, go? How did I get from the airport? Is the area walkable? With great transit? Needing a cab and tricky? Do I wish I knew how to drive while there?

Are they completely set up with a collection of lamplights? Is there candlelight encouraged? Do I have to settle for overhead lighting?

What does their soap smell like? Is it fruity? Is it creamy and grainy and soothes my skin? Is it a bar or a refill pump? Do they have a bidet or recycled toilet paper or triple-ply?

I would love to know who do you become when somewhere else? Do you feel at home in other people’s homes like I do and enjoy living their life for a short time? Are you inspired by other people to explore other versions of yourself?

I love you,

Lauren xoxo

Three things I struggled with this week:

• 🍴 As a lot of you know I have been working back at a restaurant I have worked at on and off for a long time. Today, two regulars came in, who I haven’t seen in over two years. One of them I remembered as grumpy, rude, demanding. All of that was softened by the reality of mortality and his changed and rapidly aged condition.

• ⌛ I actually continue to feel like I do not have enough time but when I add up the hours spent on things, I have more than enough time so am I just exhausted about being here? You know, on earth? Anyone else just blergh this week? Because so many in my orbit seem to be stretched thin and feeling like we are here but not really.

• 🕶️ Saying goodbye to a cat I instantly fell in love with and putting on my sunglasses because of the ‘glare’.

Three blessings from this week:

• 🌄 I spent five days on Vancouver Island, on a house sit. It was pure magic. There were rainy spatters on the window with a cup of tea in hand, cat cuddles, cooking, dancing, sunrise and sunset watching, naps, snacks, walks, face masks and oh-so-much writing.

• 💘 It’s times like these I am so grateful for my recovery groups and communities. 

• 🎧 My podcast was recorded IN STUDIO for the first time. This is big and cool and exciting! Look out for those episodes in the coming weeks with magical guests!

Three goals for the coming week:

• 🎙️ Make time to sit and enjoy an amazing opportunity that came my way this week. Sit with the news and be grateful, and manifest its magic happening for me ongoing.

• 😹 Learn my set for my first comedy show back in over two years. (Yeah I wrote about it and now I am doing it!) I am not terrified at all. At all. 👀

• 🛋️ Rest.

What I am enjoying this week: 

My friend Molly has an incredible new podcast that I am so grateful for. It is called Project Perseverance. I was so inspired from the get-go—the journal prompt in episode one helped me get creatively unstuck while big-time following my heart. Also—and I say this as someone with a podcast with hour-long episodes—some of the episodes are the perfect length, at around fifteen minutes, to squeeze in on a lunch break or walk.

In Molly’s words:

It can be so tempting to quit when life gets hard! But the reality is when we persevere, we overcome. Want to run your race instead of your neighbour’s? Want to finish strong and actually get your words out from brain to book? Want to stay focused when the shiny over there beckons you? Listen in. This is for you when you’re struggling and want to quit. Keep the momentum. One step at a time. We’re in this together. This is Project Perseverance.

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